I get so many questions and statements and opinions (soooooooooo many opinions) on why I write my blog, I figured it’s time to answer some of them. I’ll be straight right now, you’re gonna get honesty from me here.
I started writing my blog originally because I’m out here in Indiana and my family and the majority of my friends are not. They have not and probably will not ever visit me here and therefore will never see my house. It started out as “Look at how I decorated my brand new, empty house” to “Look at what I’ve changed/built/created/etc.” just so that those people could see where I live because they more than likely will never step foot inside. I have never, nor will I ever, care if anyone outside of that circle reads my blog. I don’t want to get paid for it. There isn’t a company looking to sponsor a girl in middle-America who does semi-decent DIY that swears far too much. I’m not DIY Blogger friendly. I don’t want people from other countries reading it. Or random strangers. But if they do, I’m OK with that. But none of that is the intent of me writing on the blog.
From the start I’ve always loved decorating and I think I’m fairly OK at it and apparently some others do as well, because people constantly tell me I’m in the wrong industry. But aren’t we all? Seriously. I would probably hate my job if I was an interior designer- because it’s a JOB. I love to decorate but I don’t want to be forced to abide by other peoples design requirements or choices. I like MY decorating. Not all houses need to look like mine. That would be boring.
I also do DIY as a way to relax. My mom is always telling me to take a break, enjoy my weekends, slow down a minute. But sometimes, to me, sanding a dresser IS my relaxation. The loud, obnoxious hum of a power tool drowns out all the assholes out there. It’s my quiet place. I need that outlet or else I am the asshole out there and no one wants that.
I began refinishing furniture because I had just purchased a rather large house and barely had enough furniture to fill a small apartment bedroom. If I wanted to look like I should own said house, I should probably furnish it. I didn’t have people out here handing me pieces of furniture to put in my house, nor did I really want that. I wanted to pick my own furniture out. But if you haven’t purchased an entire house worth of furniture lately- let me break this down for you- that shit's expensive. It’s expensive for cheap shit, never mind something of quality. I’ll also let you in on a little secret- I’m not loaded. I’m not rich. I’m not a trust fund baby. I don’t have a sugar daddy. It’s me and my mediocre salary, with a house payment and a love for quality food that's not in the form of a frozen cardboard container. So there wasn’t much left over at the end of the bill cycle to buy brand new everything for my new palace. I scoured Craigslist, Goodwill stores, yard sales. Aside from my bedroom furniture that was purchased for me as a house warming present and my living room set that I purchased new, most everything in my house is used or discounted or built by me. Because that’s what I had to do rather than going into massive credit card debt.
I’m also one that loves a challenge and doesn’t like to be told no or that I can’t do something. My whole life I’ve been in the “prove them wrong” state of mind- from leaving my hometown to go away to college, to my majoring in a male dominated industry, to making it pretty damn high up in the sports world- don't tell me I can't do it. I also love to learn and fiddle around with things. Since we didn’t own a home growing up, I never had to worry about any house related stuff- meaning I never had to learn how to fix things. But I was intrigued by it. I can't tell you how many times I took off the outlet covers and pulled out the wires to see the connections- at the age of 9. Or how I dismantled shelving units/cabinets/door locks- to see how they were put together and to see if I could put them back together. Should've been an engineer- I would have all the money in the world to just buy everything I wanted and not have to worry about doing it myself. HAH! But this was new to me and I think I loved the challenge of figuring home ownership out. I knew I couldn’t afford to hire out everything single thing I wanted to change in my house just because I didn't know how to do it. So I learned to change out a light fixture. Then I learned to put in a ceiling fan. Then I learned how to rip out wire shelving and install wood shelves. Every time I learned to do something new, it pushed me to learn more. And I always say to anyone that asks “aren’t you scared you’ll screw something up?”- well, no actually. Not at all. I can always pay someone to fix it if I can’t figure it out. Or call someone to help me figure it out. If you start small enough and succeed at it, it gives you the confidence to try something bigger. Take that as a life lesson. Boom.
But the big thing that has kept me writing the blog aside from all of these reasons- is you guys. The questions that I get on what to do with this dresser. Or how do you think this would look? Or the "done" photo and the exclamation marks that accompany the "Look at this!" and "I did this!" I feel like maybe a really small part of me might maybe help some of you get the courage to try something on your own that maybe you wouldn't have before. But the fact that someone out there reads a post about something I built or painted or sewed or re-purposed and asks me if I think they could do that too? That's an amazing feeling. Because the answer is YES- always YES. Don't keep a tan paint on your walls just because you are scared of color. Paint the walls bright fucking purple! If it ends up looking like a fat dinosaur and you hate it- you can always go back to tan for roughly $35 and a half-days worth of manual labor. Easy peasy. Don't be scared!
I know I am no expert. At anything really. Except at sarcasm. I'm amazing at that. But really though- I'm just an average 38 year old female. One who has her good days that hopefully out-number the bad days. Who has tried to figure things out and sometimes, more than people realize, has failed miserably at them. So miserably. Who has champagne taste on a Kool-Aid budget and has to be forced to realize that at times, no matter how disappointing it may be. Who has to step back at times and realize there are a lot of things that I will never have, that life isn't fair, that life does suck sweaty balls at times. Who at times is so miserable and tired and moody that I just want to crawl under my covers and shut the world out entirely. I'm human.
So that's why I do the blog. Even when I'm dead tired. I enjoy the fuck out of it. Read it, don't read it. Like it, don't like it. But I hope that the time you spent reading it- that you enjoyed what I wrote about. And I possibly made you laugh at least one time. If you didn't, obviously you are dead inside cuz I'm fucking hilarious.