Monday, April 25, 2011

Its Gonna be a Bright...... Sunshiny day!!!!

Eventually......maybe...... hopefully.....

It seriously feels like it was last September that we actually had a sunny day.  I think my weekly forecast for the last 3 weeks has been a cross between rain, thunderstorms, tornadoes, and severe weather.  I'll tell you what though.... There's NOTHING like tornado sirens going off until 3AM.  Nothing.  I guess its a good thing that I'm right next to one of the towers that blows that obnoxious horn.  I just don't prefer it to go off when I'm trying to sleep.  Cuz this mama needs her sleep.  Nor do I ever plan to bunker down in my coat closet- which is literally 2ft X 5ft.  if I'm going to die, its either going to be on my comfy couch or my really comfy bed. 

This weekend was no different with the weather so I had to make the best out of it.  A bunch of us (including Miss Wendy and Miss Judy- SHOUT OUT!) went out to a celebratory Going Away dinner at a del-icious Mexican restaurant.  (Not Desperado's delicious- but definitely a great place) They had A-MAZING raspberry margarita's for $1.99- ummmm yeah..... let's just say they were very yummmmmmmy!!!!  And very strong!  We said goodbye for now to Kristi and Chad as they moved to Virginia to start their new jobs.  Had lots of chips and salsa and tons of laughs.  Its always a great time hanging out with this group of friends.  They've definitely taken me in as one of their own since I've moved here.  LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

If I had a million dollars….or ten

Do you ever think about what you would do if you won the lottery?  I mean, seriously won the lottery.  Not like $10,000. More like $10 million... or more (hopefully).  It would have to be something significant to actually make a dent because you know that almost half of it is taken out for taxes, right? (Bullshit cough cough) Well I was working from home the last two weekends and there was shit on for TV (and yes, I get paid to sit on my ass and watch TV and drink wine. Jealous???). So I came across a show on TLC about people who have won the lottery. And this one isn’t based on the idiots who blow it on brass sculptures and Lamborghini's, its more about people who’ve changed their lives with their winnings (or at least HAVEN’T blown it on brass sculptures and Lamborghini's!). I mean, one of the girls went and bought her two sisters boob jobs- so believe me- they aren’t humanitarians or anything afterwards. 


But it got me thinking about what I would do if I ever won that much cash. Who would I give money to? What would I pay off? What would I BUY? Would I invest? Would I blow it all in 3 months? Would I tell anyone? Would I change my name and fall off the face of the earth? Would I donate it to charity? Would I quit my job? See- there are a lot of things that can happen to a person when you win the lottery (says the person who has never won the lottery). One never knows how they will handle it until they are put into the position of being an Insta-millionaire. Just add water.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Party in the U.S.A.

Did you all watch Dancing with the Stars last night? I’m not quite sure what the deal is this season, but what’s up with all the lame ass themes they are doing? I get it. They are on their 12th season so they are trying to “spice” things up a bit. But my idea of “spicing things up” isn’t watching the pairs grind to God Bless America. If anything could be less “American” it would be a Latin dance to “Sweet Home Alabama.” You guys know I love me some Ralph Macchio. But what was up with the mom-jeans he was wearing? I don’t think I’ve seen a guy look any more awkward than him in denim. And ABC, please don’t ever consider Miley Cyrus as the definition of American or put her in the same company as Sinatra and/or Elvis again. While I understand that you are owned by Disney trying to keep the younger audience, that’s completely delusional of you think that “Party in the USA” was anything other than a 2010 gay summer anthem. No seriously- it was. YouTube it. The gays love it. There’s like 10,000 versions of the video up there.  And I can totally say that (all of you that just gasped at your computer screen.   "Like, OMG, she totally did NOT just go there.") because I, too, was a 2010 gay summer anthem.  

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Heeeeey Yooooou Guuuuuuuuuuys!

OMG.  I seriously don't feel like I did anything this weekend.  I mean, I DID work on Saturday.  And today I DID do laundry and I vacuumed.  And laid on the couch watching the Sox and Celtics.  But other than that.... nothing.  At least I got up in between games and showered so I didn't still smell like last night's smoky bar (ew) ALL day long.  I almost feel a little "Sloth-like" at this point (hence the blog title).  I think it just feels weird because it was a nice (60ish) day out and I wasn't in my garage painting/sanding/staining something.  It actually felt nice to just sit and chill and eat ice cream and drink beer

Hopefully next weekend (if its nice out), I can go get some magical cure fertilizer for my lawn to see if that makes it a little greener this summer.  Last year I didn't have much time to spend on it because of my job and all of the traveling.  But this year I'm really hoping to do something ANYTHING with it.  I have the largest lawn in the development and it looks the shittiest.  I know- I'm THAT neighbor who has weeds and dandelions.  Screw off.  I bet the inside of your house looks like shit.  So there.  I've been procrastinating because I'm not quite sure what to do with it.  I know that I want to have a much bigger patio than the 10 X 10 that I currently have.  One that is big enough for a dining set and the gorgeous chaise lounges that are currently stacked in my garage since November.  Then once that is down I can get the rest of the yard sodded (only the front and sides of the house were sodded when I bought).  But the one thing that I have ZERO experience with is having a yard.  My problem is I want to do everything now- like plant a garden, plant flowers, have beautiful blooming shrubs, put up a fence, and buy outdoor furniture... Ideally I'd really like Ahmed Hassan no he's not a terrorist that I know of the host of Yard Crashers to show up at my local Lowe's at the exact time that I am there and pick ME to have a free backyard renovation!  But since I know that's not going to happen....

Monday, April 11, 2011

Pasty white to dark tan in 4.5 hours.

Miss Thing here got a really long, tediously boring project done this past weekend.  But let's start with this.  Who enjoyed that 80 degree weather that we had on Sunday????? Woot woot!!  Ahhhh its so great to have nice warm weather happening out there.  It actually was so warm out that I had to turn on my AC.  I know- completely ridiculous- seeing as though just two days ago I had the heat on.  But I had the doors open all day (partially from the nice weather but mostly because of the project I was completing) and it heated my house to 76 degrees.  I wouldn't have minded this temp (seeing as though that's usually what my heat is on for Christ's sake).  But after I went running outside in a long sleeve tee in the nice HOT weather (Go Kristi!  It's yo birthday!) and came back into the sauna that was my house at that point, I HAD to take a cold shower (simmer down boys) and turn on the AC.  Well the funny thing is that I never changed my automatic thermostat to OFF when I left for work this morning.  So when I normally have the heat on... and when I leave it set from 8am-5:45pm at 55 degrees... so that the heat doesn't kick on...... do you see where I'm going here????  Ya.  This idiot girl walked into the house at 6pm and it felt colder than the arctic.  Ummm yea can't wait to see that electric bill of 8 hours of 55 degree air condition.... Needless to say- that won't happen again.  Dumbass.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

I'm A Celebrity, baby. (And just a little bit delusional)

Did you ever think growing up that you were going to be famous one day?  For me, it was like a daily occurrence.  I had this idea of myself from an early age that I was going to make it big (in lord knows what) and I was going to be rich and on the cover of magazines.  Of course it would only be for good stories, not ones involving my girly bits being shown in public or stealing jewelry when I clearly had enough money to pay for it.  I would be best friends with Britney Spears (you KNOW I totally wouldn't have let her go bat shit crazy and shave her head or, for that matter, marry K-Fed).  And I would be the only woman to tame the latest Hollywood bachelor.  But I digress.

See what I'm talking about?  Slightly delusional.  At first, I was going to be an Olympic ice skater.  I remember sitting on my living room floor watching the girls on their skates and I thought- I want to be like her.  It didn't help that one of the best US skaters at that time had the same name as me.  Or that one of my friends parents used to call me Yami (Yamaguchi), which only helped me in this dream.  I was fortunate enough to take ice skating lessons (thanks to my mother for teaching the other skaters warm-ups so that I could skate for free) and be in an ice show.  I'm pretty sure I was a Dutch milk-maid- NOT my idea of a video montage looking back at the beginning of my career when I was the feature story years later with Bob Costas, going for my 3rd gold medal win.  Plus I get wicked motion sickness, so there go all of the points on spins that I would lose.  And there ended that dream.